Video chat, text or letter as communications?
Everyone knows communication is key in any and all relationships; the smoother the communication, the better the relationship. Nothing beats being physically and emotionally present for your partner in the flesh, however, as people in long-distance know painfully well, that is not always a possibility. Long-distance is never a piece of cake, but technology helps a whole lot, in staying as connected as possible when there are miles between you and your loved one. Texting is foundational but as frequently quoted, “the lowest form of communication.” Video chat is better because it incorporates some semblance of physical presence but a wonderful way to communicate with your partner outside of pixels, is to write a handwritten letter once in a while, so they can feel your presence in an organic way.
Why Letters Can Be The Best Way To Maintain a LDR Strong
1. Letters are a more personalized form of communication
A text in a computer-generated font isn’t the same, in impact, as your words are when delivered in your own handwriting. A letter has got the power that makes your partner feel closer to you and who you are as a person because your handwriting really captures the essence of the person it belongs to. Everyone has unique handwriting, so it makes your words undeniably yours.
2. They give your partner something tangible to hold
Not being able to physically touch your partner is arguably the most agonizing characteristic of relationships gone long distance and if communication is always in byte format, it feels less personal and your relationship becomes more of a two-dimensional affair. This is why; one needs something tangible and palpable to be reminded of your very real three-dimensional existence and what an important part of their life you are. Gifts are another way to accomplish this very important end goal.
3. The anticipation is exciting
The convenience of a text that gets delivered in a manner of seconds is undeniable; having said that, there is something to be said about the physical response to waiting to hear back from a loved one. The time your partner’s love in their words is in transit, you are building up to the climax, a sweet and anxious kind of excitement. It helps you feel like a special thing is happening and that feeling is very important in long-distance when things can get a bit flat line and uninteresting.
4. It is Romantic with a Capital R
Everyone wants and needs love, affection, and companionship. Everyone wants to feel special and there is just something about the old school pigeon courier mail that new-age communication just cannot beat. The romance of the gesture of a handwritten old school letter as opposed to a text saying the same stuff just does not compare. Regardless of their gender, your partner will be swooped off their feet if they receive handwritten mail from you – like a modern-day Juliet.
5. The physical response when “You’ve Got Mail” is thrilling
True, texts can also make our hearts beat faster and the walls of our mind sing love songs, but with old fashioned letters, it’s that times a thousand. Long-distance relationships are doomed if you stop making each other feel undeniable physical chemistry, which is no less than a challenge given that there is very limited physical access. The physical response of your heart beating and your head buzzing and your hands unfolding the special way they write your name is special and a great tool to save your relationship through long distance. You would be stupid to not make use of this opportunity to make them feel something strongly towards you.
6. It gives you enough time between letters to say meaningful things
Communication in texts is mostly reactionary and the speed and convenience of saying anything in the world make you forget to say the important things and savor your partner’s every word. Letters take time and involve quite some waiting time, so they mostly have, let’s just say, much better content and much more carefully chosen words.
7. It’s a tried and tested tradition
When you write the one you love an old-fashioned hand-written letter you are participating in a ritual that many of histories most revered men and women participated in and is sure as hell the classiest way to communicate.
8. Bonding time
When you are long-distance it is easy for romance to dwindle and you need to give reasons to your partner to think about you outside of missing you terribly. Texts do not garner the same level of attention and thought that letters do. A well-written letter will have your partner focusing on you for the entirety of the time they read and reread it and hold it to their heart. This lets you two bond and spends time “with” each other, despite being so far away. Through letters, you are spending time with each other or the thought of each other in a positive way. You, while you reflect, compose and write the letter and them while they read and reflect. That can make the difference between a relationship being saved or lost to long distances.
3 Very Important Occasion For Letters
It is a great idea to exchange letters frequently if not regularly, but special occasions are golden opportunities, not to be missed! When on ordinary days you can stick to short sweet ones, big occasions require you to put your grand, extra and mawkish affectionate boots on! Let your letters on these occasions feature something special maybe a few printed out pictures of you two on special occasions or milestones in your relationships and a thoughtful meaningful gift for them.
9. His birthday
It is your partner’s birthday and you are far away from each other, that itself is no less than a tragic circumstance. Their birthday is an auspicious time for you to tell them how much they mean to you and what you love about them in your own words. They are sure to cherish this beyond words and be absolutely flabbergasted. Unfolding a love letter and then reading it with a stupid smile on your face is sure to make your day! A sweet gift would be the cherry on top!
10. Your anniversary
Another highly important, and equally tragic, occasion to not be with your partner is on your anniversary. This calls for a long, grand gesture handwritten letter that is sure to make them feels so close to you and remind them what your relationship means to both of you! Maybe a walk down memory lane or something tough that you two overcome together. If you could do that you can for sure beat long distance! Let it be hopeful, loving and full of optimism and affection.
11. Big Milestone (promotion, graduation)
Milestones are important and how you make your partner feel during these milestones decides if your relationship will last or not. Being physically removed greatly limits your options but a sweet letter of support and reassurance can go a long way in making your partner feel supported and loved and cared for deeply. Celebrate their success; if they’ve graduated tell them how much you love how smart and determined they are; if they just got promoted, admire their work ethic and how you know how talented they are and how far they are sure to go! Everyone needs these reassurances and in an old-fashioned letter, they are sure to keep them close to their heart and on their person as keepsakes and lucky charms. It is very important to make your partner feel special.
Long-distance is not easy, but a breakup is not an inevitability if both partners put in the time and effort and also manage their expectations. In fact, long-distance for short periods of time can be a great way to engender better and healthier relationships as you learn to value your partner’s presence even more. Communicate clearly and often and use alternatives to technology whenever the opportunity presents itself. Writing old school handwritten letters for your loved one is a great way to sustain and rekindle the romance and something everyone with a long-distance relationship should consider trying.
The more you understand yourself, the more silence there is, the healthier you are. —Maxime Lagacé