Requesting For Nudes: A Really Sensitive Request
Receiving a request for nudes is enough for anybody to be absolutely freaked out at that moment, depending on who the requester is, the mood, the setting, and directness. That’s pretty understandable though, as sharing pictures of intimate nature through an online medium is risky business. Even if we disregard the threat of leakages or hacking for a bit, just the nude request itself could come off as awkward or creepy enough for them to lose respect for you.
While asking them to send nudes, you may think of it as a new way to get some ‘spank bank’ material that works almost as good as seeing her in person. However, the person on the other side may perceive it as a statement of their value and/or worth as a human. This means some huge alarms could go off in their heads in the exact moment you send that message, possibly causing them to just ghost you in utter shock. But all that depends largely on your approach to forward such a request, and this article is all about addressing that.
6 Ways to Request For Nudes Successfully And Still Keep The Relationship
1. Don’t directly ask for nude pictures
Let’s admit it, there’s nothing more unattractive or creepier than a guy directly begging you for your nude pics. The girl isn’t going to be impressed, and she won’t enjoy seeing you wheedle and whine. She’ll get super uncomfortable super quickly, leaving her no option other than ghosting you. Even worse, you’ll get simply told off. No one wants to experience that. So how should you really approach this?
First, she has got to be your partner. You can’t just slide into random peoples’ DMs, and send a two-word message telling them to send nudes. Also, the relationship between you and your partner should be a developed one, it’s unnatural and creepy to expect nudes in a new relationship that’s in its early stages. It’s a huge turnoff. No matter how you shroud your words or intentions, such as trying to be polite, nice, or even aggressive – there’s nothing that could make a direct random nude request work. Follow a step-by-step procedure that involves starting with the base of a well-developed relationship, waiting for the right time, setting the mood, appreciating her, and then offering her to ‘exchange’ nudes. We’ve gone into more detail about this below, so keep reading!
2. Vulgarity is a no-no
By ruling out the vulgarity, we don’t mean to rule out dirty talk. In many ways, sexting and nudes go hand in hand. Vulgarity refers to talking or bringing up things from your imagination that’d obviously be too much objectification for them to feel comfortable with. You’re going to ruin the mood with such ideas, so take it slow.
To mention a hugely practiced example of blatant vulgarity, sending unsolicited dick pics is right up there. Whatever the true way to a woman’s heart may be, it’s definitely not your hairy, badly photographed manhood popping up on their screen without a built-up mood or context. Also, you can’t send the texts that tell her to ‘show you her tits’, as it’s a juvenile, disrespectful, and an objectifying way to lodge a request. Ask for her pictures in a manner that lets her know you truly value her, and aren’t just perceiving her as another girl that helps you jerk off at night.
3. Always make sure that they feel safe
Even when your partner is willing to share such photos, there’s an underlying security threat as they’ll be shared via the internet. Hacking is a genuine problem in the real world today, and even celebrities aren’t safe from it. But that’s sadly not the only way intimate photos get leaked; there are irresponsible, shameless boys who pass their phone around while drinking with their buddies, having no respect for the pictures that girls ‘entrust’ them with.
Women have rightfully become more and more wary of such threats as this behavior carried on. Some pissed off ex could just ruin her entire life by sending the wrong photos to the wrong people on a drunken night, or just straight up upload them on a porn site. It’s incredibly important that you make her feel absolutely safe before you ask for nudes, to avoid getting ghosted. Not saying you need to make sacred promises (not that they’d be effective), but just be open about your principles of respect, and let her know how you conduct your private affairs, and she’ll know.
4. Get them in ‘the mood’ before asking
It’s probably the most important aspect of asking your partner to send you nudes. You’ve got to start some butterflies flying around her stomach and at least get their motor running before you both are able to openly and comfortably start sharing intimate photos.
Now setting the mood requires some uncontrollable prerequisites; e.g. they have to be free of any stress or major tension arising from a current problem in their lives, they haven’t had their mood ruined on a long day at work, and they’re feeling well physically, etc. So, you’ve got to make sure that all such prerequisites and other factors are working in your favor – after all, she won’t be happy to see a request for nudes if her brother just got hospitalized yesterday following due to some accident. She might even ghost you, who knows?
We’ve mentioned that having a well-developed relationship with your partner is a serious requirement for forwarding nude requests. This means that you must have had numerous sexy encounters in person, so you could start to get them in the mood by reminding them of some of these moments.
Go slow, bring up the intimate times you’ve both mutually experienced. Don’t put undue pressure on them by being too aggressive. Simply begin things with a compliment, let them know that your mind keeps wandering to them. That’s how you change their mood, and they’re suddenly interested in this text convo more than ever. If you’ve got her feeling safe and sexy enough, an offer for exchanging nudes is most likely to be successful at this point.
5. Make her feel super-hot!
We’ve touched upon getting her to ‘feel sexy’, and that’s actually a detailed way of getting nudes in itself. Even if it wasn’t just for the selfish purpose of getting nude images of them, truly appreciating your partner always goes a long way in making them genuinely happy and proud to be with you. Make her feel like she’s the sexiest girl in the city, tell her how easy it is for her to turn you on without even trying. If you’re really in love with your partner, you wouldn’t even be needing to fake these compliments.
If she puts up an attractive picture on any of her social media, as her boyfriend, you can always take it to her inbox to tell them how hot they look, and what exactly it is about the picture that you love the most. If she exclusively sends you a picture where they’re sneakily showing off a shoulder or the butt they’ve recently been squatting for, don’t leave them hanging! Respond quickly by telling her that they look stunning, and they’re seriously having an effect on you, visually and… Ahem, physically.
6. Follow her clues
You’re not the only one in the relationship who’s got a sex drive, your partner has it too, as shy as they may be to express it. Sometimes they may drop hints that obviously let a sane person know that they’re in ‘the mood’ for sexting or dirty talk. She’ll bring up the hot temperature in her room, and maybe use it as an excuse to tell you what she’s wearing. Your task here should be to work with your partner to climb up the ladder of sexting, step by step. This isn’t the time to chat about the hot weather, rather step things up a notch.
What To Do If You Get Ghosted? Or Called A Pervert?
At the end of the day, after you’ve carefully thought of every possible way or tip to make it seem as natural or comfortable for them, it all just boils down to being a yes or no question. “Hey (insert the name of your partner here), how about we exchange nudes?” – while the question would definitely be not phrased in such a formal way, but it’s the literal form of the underlying offer. They could either respond with a yes, a no, or absolutely nothing… ever. The last option means they’ve ghosted you, and that’s probably the scariest outcome of all.
Firstly, it’s absolutely necessary for you to respect their answer even if it’s a no. Take a no as a no, and don’t take it to your ego. If they’ve ghosted you, reconsider whether you guys are really the right match for each other. If you feel like the relationship deserves another shot, feel free to send them a message communicating your thoughts. Tell them that you understand that your request may have made them feel uncomfortable, and you’re extremely sorry about that. Let them know that you’d never be happy to see your partner do something they’re not comfortable with, and you’d like to continue the relationship. However, in any case, do not ever be too clingy or creepy with your messages or calls! If it’s a yes, cool, if it’s still a no, you’ve got to take it as a no.
Now that you understand the required setting, mood, and the step-by-step requirement of taking things up slowly, you’ve got to make sure your partner is satisfied with these encounters too. If they send you nudes, the last thing they expect is you acting all aloof and cold. That’s a foolproof way to ensure they never dare to send something similar ever again.
Don’t ignore them, it takes a lot to nervously take a picture and press ‘send’ in your inbox. They’ll take your unresponsive behavior right to their ego, who wants that? Ignoring or not being too excited about her pictures means they’re not hot enough for you, and that’s a deal-breaker. Truly appreciate them, compliment them, and let them know how much they mean to you. After all, this activity should be seen as an effective way of increasing the trust and affection in a healthy relationship between you and your partner. All the best!
The more you understand yourself, the more silence there is, the healthier you are. —Maxime Lagacé