What if in the pursuit of a perfect relationship, you realise that your own relationship is perfect. Yes, it is in fact possible. Things go south either when you’re not trying hard enough or trying too hard to attain the supposed perfect status. Never compare your relationship to another. There is no such thing as a standard when it comes to relationships. You need to do what’s right for you and your partner. Design efforts to make each other happy. Be considerate of each other. If both of you are happy with what you have, then that is the perfection you’ve been looking for all along.
Let’s have a look at the traits of a perfect relationship. They might sound insane, but if you read the whole thing through, you might change your mind;
It’s only normal to have arguments. You’re human and you’re wired to feel a range of emotions including anger. The next person says something you just can’t stand and it begins. Now considering that this is a normal of any relationship doesn’t mean you allow it to escalate. It’s how you deal with it. If one of you is in a fit of range, the other should be patient with them, calm them down and try to reason with them. Just work on it together to get through it.
You’re allowed to embrace your individuality
When you’re crazy in love with someone, you try to do everything how they’d like it, even so much so that you start changing as a person. It doesn’t have to be so. If the next person is equally involved, they’d never allow you to give up on the things that make you, you. It adds beauty to your relationship. The different personalities inculcate a sense of understanding and acceptance, which are essential to any relationship.
You give each other space
A perfect relationship isn’t one where you spend every single moment with each other, it’s SUFFOCATING! The next person needs their space as much as you need yours. The time you spend apart makes you appreciate their company even more. So strike a balance. Spend time with them, with other people in your life, and yes, don’t forget to make time for yourself. No one likes constantly being smothered with attention. It’s nice to stay in touch with each other when apart, but don’t overdo it.
You can have different opinions
It’s almost impossible to be constantly in agreement over stuff. Being the person you are, where you come from, and the kind of experiences you’ve had, you ought to look at things differently than others. Hence the difference in opinions. Now the tricky bit is actually accepting this fact and learning to live with it. You should understand that at times, there are no right or wrong opinions, they’re just different than yours. Also, don’t ever try to impose anything on your partner. Celebrate the differences, after all who likes monotony anyway!
You’re allowed to make mistakes
Acknowledging the fact that it’s in human nature to make mistakes, you can’t expect someone to overcome that part just because they are in a relationship. We all make mistakes, some more often than others. Accept this fact and be forgiving. Do not repeat the same mistakes over and over again, it becomes a habit. Just because someone chooses to be forbearing doesn’t mean you can take advantage of them. Never forget to make up for your mistakes even if your partner tells you it’s not necessary. The best part of making mistakes is that you get to make up to them and show them what they mean to you.
You don’t need exceptionally huge gestures
I agree that they’re romantic, and I don’t think anyone would mind them. But do they have to be extraordinary? Maybe not. A little something here or a little something there from time to time keeps things anew. It all depends on the person you’re dating or the kind of person you’re. We all have our preferences. Some of us just have to go out of our ways to do something for someone, while some of us appreciate the little things. The point is, no one should feel pressured into doing something they’re not comfortable with. If it’s from the heart, it will be appreciated, no matter how insignificant it may appear to someone else.
You might go through periods of disinterest
Even though it sounds a bit off, but you tend to go through this when you’re in a long-term relationship. Don’t get me wrong, it has nothing to do with how things are with your partner. It maybe because other things in your life are probably not going the way you want them. It could be anything ranging from family to work. You’re so stressed out with the situation that you’re in, nothing seems good enough. You become irritable, and you even try to push away the person closest to you.
While this period is equally difficult for both of you, you should try to work things out, help each other get through this period and try to rekindle the flame.
Does that sound anything like your relationship? If it does, and you’re happy with what you have, you feel loved and appreciated, then maybe this is all you need. The relationship you are in, is perfect for you, even if not for someone else. Relationships though having similarities are different from each other and need to be dealt with differently. And all you need to make your relationship perfect, is to love each other unconditionally.
The more you understand yourself, the more silence there is, the healthier you are. —Maxime Lagacé