So you give them all your and expect nothing in return your family, friends, colleagues, strangers. You pour your energy into helping others whichever way you can; you don’t even look at your schedule when someone out there needs you. And yet despite all your efforts, you’re the one always left behind holding an umbrella just big enough to cover both your heart and theirs.
You care too much. When it leaves stranded with nothing left for yourself, you wish to yourself If only I didn’t care and love as much as I do. But that’s where you’re wrong. You cannot change who you are based on others’ attitude towards you; they aren’t facts. What the fact actually is that it’s a great sign of strength and resilient willpower to stay caring and loving in a cruel world.
Don’t let the world change that in you. Besides, to be caring in a world gone all too oblivious to humanity’s wellbeing is considered a rebellious act so might as well play it. Here are some upsides of being a too caring person especially girls who feel and care too deeply and hence hurt too deeply too. Don’t change your caring nature because:
1. That is who you are
That is the thing about good people who care and feel too much they do so regardless of how they get treated in return; because that is who they truly are. You cannot run from who you are. Even after you have given them your best and get treated not so fairly in the end, you will most likely take the not-so-nice road, get all revengeful and bitter towards others and about life in general.
But there will always be a hole inside you that can only be filled with the smiles of others after you make them happy, or the comfort you bring in their life and so forth. Making a difference in others’ life by showing them your selfless devotion and care is the only way you know because that’s who you are. You cannot change that, nor will it be worth it, for that hole will eat you up inside out till there is nothing left for you to live for.
2. You will have no regrets
If someone does bad to you but you show them kindness, care for them and want what’s best for them, rather than going all revengeful on them then later, you won’t have any regrets. You won’t look back and think to yourself oh hey, what if I had been nicer to them instead of getting back at them would we be good friends by now? Be your caring, nurturing self regardless of what others do.
3. You will find redemption
It is always easy to become a nothing, for it is always easy to fulfil. What takes courage is to feel too much, care too much, love and hence give too much. No one said it would be easy. In order to give something, you have to get something too. By giving away your genuine love and care, however, what you mostly end up with is hurt; humans are too weak a tool to fulfil each and every one of your expectations.
But that is not the end of the line for you. Even in that bottomless pit of hurt you will too often feel yourself drowning into, you will see redemption in that hurt. It will make you understand the true value of pain and how its presence makes one strive for relief. After all, light would not exist if the darkness was not there to devour upon everything. So don’t lose yourself in the hurt because there is always a silver lining.
You just have to look closer instead of giving up on your caring nature and closing your eyes in that moment of hurt. You might miss your chance at redemption. So never back down and keep going, using your drive to feel and care to help those in need of it.
4. It will make you stronger
As crazy as it sounds, it’s true after all caring and feeling and loving too much is not weakness but strength. Consider about it you help someone out going through a hard time in their life, because you don’t want them to get hurt and suffer alone; and why do you do that again?
Because that is who you are: you care about them, you feel for them. But they only use you, take every advice you give them, use it to their benefit and then just leave you, without even so much as a thank you for being there for me. Your first instinct would most likely be to do something hurtful to them in return.
But if you overcome that bitterness and forgive them instead wouldn’t that be overcoming your bad side? That is some strength there now, isn’t it?
5. It’s okay
You can always feel too much and care a lot for things and people who probably don’t deserve it or maybe they do. It’s okay to feel too much, to love too much, to care too much, to stay by their side longer. It is okay to be too much. Something is always better than nothing. Some are too numb to even care at all. So wouldn’t you want to feel everything so very deeply while you still can?
Talk to me
Are you someone who cares too much? What are some of the problems you’ve had to face in life? Let me know in the comments below!
The more you understand yourself, the more silence there is, the healthier you are. —Maxime Lagacé