Love is a tricky business. If you ask me the key ingredient of a successful love life, I’d say “Efforts” every time. When you commit to a person and they return that commitment, efforts on both sides is what makes the commitment easy to hold. A book I read changed my definition of love for good. To give you a short version, it said that most love lives take a toll because the partners take “love as a noun” when it should be treated as a verb. What it means is, when you take loving actions that show affection and care towards the other person, love flourishes. The fact that you’re reading this article shows that you’re willing to make that effort. Here are 10 proven ways that will keep your man hopelessly in love with you.
10 Proven Way to Reel Him in & Keep Him Interested
1. Love Yourself
Loving yourself is the first step towards letting someone in on your life. This might sound cliché at first but when you look at it logically, things would start to fall in place. Knowing your self-worth and leaving room for self-admiration will allow you to treat your partner with respect as well. If you don’t believe that you are worthy of love in the first place, you will struggle to build a long-term relationship with your partner. Similarly, knowing your strengths and shortcomings from the start of your relationship will prove to be the foundation of keeping your partner interested in the long haul.
2. Be spontaneous
In a long-term relationship, things might start to get boring as sure habits and routines are religiously followed over the years. In order to break the monotony of everyday routines, try finding a way to make those day-to-day activities a bit more entertaining. For e.g., you may come back home tired after a 9-5 job after which you hardly talk to your partner. Taking the lack of communication into account, you could sit down with your partner before going to bed and you may ask him open-ended questions such as “did you have a good day?” instead of asking “how was your day?”. Your partner is much more likely to open up if your body language matches your words as you show any interest in what you are talking about. Likewise, you could make plans as simple as going out every weekend instead of sitting at home and watching TV. In terms of a relationship where you and your partner are still working things out, spontaneity could be the single ingredient that you are missing out on as being spontaneous will not only be a great bonding experience but it will also introduce your partner to your rollicking side.
Being open to discussion about new ideas and topics always requires both parties to contribute. Communicating your thoughts, needs, and feelings to your partner is essential as it will keep them on track regarding how you’re feeling or what needs to be done in a particular situation. For a relationship to last long and your partner to stay interested in the relationship, sharing little details and secrets about your life will ensure a healthy connection to foster in the long-term. One of the biggest challenges that couples face when it comes to working on issues is that they fail to get their idea across to the other person which leaves room for doubt and assumptions which may lead to the eventual downfall of the relationship.
4. Be thankful
Showing appreciation for things as little as him opening the door for you or him getting a box of chocolates when you are on your periods is what matters the most. You cannot expect your partner to continue doing the things that he does for you if he feels that his efforts go unnoticed. Moreover, partners tend to take each other for granted in the long-term so stroking his ego at times by complimenting him by telling him how good he looks or mentioning how you love the fragrance of the perfume that he’s wearing will make him feel desired.
5. Open up to him
Opening up to him about your own failures and weaknesses might make you feel vulnerable but it has an upside to it as this will surely pave a way for an intimate connection to be formed in the relationship. He might be hesitant to open up at first but taking the lead will establish a sure amount of trust in this amorous entanglement.
6. Show interest in his interests
The essence of a long-term relationship is understanding and appreciating what excites your partner the most. Men crave a relationship where their partner is able to share the same passion that they have for sure things in their life. Asking him simple questions like what he enjoys listening to, what he does when he feels that his day was dull and tedious, and what motivates him to keep going will make him acknowledge the effort you made to show an interest in his life. If you are looking for a connection that lasts, you should not pretend to show an interest in his life whatsoever as your partner will take the hint that you are merely looking for a pastime.
7. Accept that men need space sometimes
Understanding the way that a man’s brain works are crucial to maintaining a healthy aspect of your relationship as this also includes giving your partner some space without panicking and immediately jumping to the conclusion that he might be losing interest in the relationship. Learning when not to press his buttons and taking a step back to see what might have caused him to react in such a manner will prove propitious in the long run. While giving your partner some space, you must have a distraction to prevent yourself from overthinking the situation. This is why you also need to have a life outside the relationship. Pursuing your goals and ambitions along with supporting your partner to pursue his goals will set the groundwork for bringing happiness into the relationship instead of relying on your partner as a means of your happiness. One thing to be kept in mind is that being in a relationship doesn’t mean that you lose your individual traits but it’s the contribution of both people that makes the stay worthwhile.
8. Don’t play hard to get
This may work in the short-term as this strategy might make you more appealing in his eyes, however, the transitory nature from chasing you to getting to know you might not be picture perfect. This might happen because at first, he was drawn in and intrigued by the idea of having you, much more like a ‘prize’ that he hoped to achieve. It is only once that you give in, he might lose interest as he might consider the chase much better than getting to know you on a much personal level. In order to prevent this from happening, you might want to opt for this strategy at the beginning of a relationship but having your partner continuously guess what might interest you will tire him out in the long-run.
9. Accept his flaws and support him
Recognizing his flaws and strengths should not push you away from him; instead, showing him that you care for him will make him feel that you have his back no matter what. Another challenge that couples face when it comes to a long-term relationship is that they subtly try to mold their partners to their own liking. This is one thing that should particularly be avoided at all costs as it may push him away from you as he may feel that you do not accept him for who he is.
10. Spice it up!
Lastly, don’t be afraid to try new things out in the bedroom. It is normal for couples to follow a particular routine or stick to what they had been doing for a long time. However, in the long term, this would make things repetitive in nature and the passion that adds a little spice in your lives may dry out at a sure point. To add some color to your love life, make sure that you and your partner are both open-minded to any idea that either of you put out on the table and is comfortable in trying out new things.
Love may feel magical at first but if sure steps aren’t taken to keep this feeling alive, your partner might start to lose interest in the relationship. Keeping the abovementioned pointers in mind, you will clearly understand how to hold onto someone’s interest after the initial attraction phase.
The more you understand yourself, the more silence there is, the healthier you are. —Maxime Lagacé