Do you seem to lose touch with friends? Are you repetitively being let down by those you consider your best friends?
The feeling of being ignored by those who are friends in your eyes can be the worst thing ever. You may jump to the conclusion that you are not a nice person, and no one wants to hang out with you.
Don’t be so hard on yourself. You may be making a few inexcusable mistakes that are pushing people away from you. Or you may be a total pushover, and people take you for granted and do not appreciate all the things you do for them.
Below are five insightful reasons you don’t have any friend:
1. You try too hard. And it shows!
You come off as too clingy and needy. Are you continually pursuing people to meet you, even when they don’t seem too keen to make time for you? Or when you complete a friend or a group of friends, do you continuously try to get everyone to stay back, even if it’s apparent that they’re bored stiff?
Spending time with a new friend may matter a lot to you, but you could come off as a very clingy and annoying person when you try too hard. Just relax, and be more laid back.
2. You’re too negative.
You’re full of dark energy of the wrong kind, and you make people feel uncomfortable around you. Have you ever seen characters in movies or people on the street that make you feel uncomfortable, and you don’t know why?
You may not pay too much attention to your thoughts, but when you’re also full of negativity, bitterness, or anger, it shows. And it makes people want to move a few inches away from you even when they sit next to you.
3. You have a hard time picking social cues.
Is the person you’re talking to getting bored? Do you even realize this is the third time they’re looking at their watch? Did you even notice that your friend’s staring at their social media page on the phone while you’re in the middle of an interesting conversation?
Just because you think you’re having a fun time doesn’t mean everyone else. Please pay attention to the behavior of people around you when you talk to them. And change the conversation the minute you seem others getting distracted.
4. You’re a selfish person.
Admit it. No one may have told you this, but you’re more worried about your own needs than anyone else’s. When you meet your friends, all you’re concerned about is about you having a good time. You don’t think about an evening out with friends as a collective moment to get together and have fun.
You selfishly extract happiness from the conversation with others and are only interested in hearing what you want to hear and talking about things you want to talk about.
5. You read between the lines.
And you read it way too much! You continuously assume the whole world revolves around you. So your friend shared a quote on Facebook? Wait, does that have something to do with you? Was there a secret message addressed to you in that? Is he or she trying to say something to you? Stop!
Please stop trying always to assume that there’s a hidden agenda or meaning behind everything a friend does or says and that it somehow has something to do with you. When you start reading between the lines all the time, you’re going to end up making a lot of assumptions.
The more you understand yourself, the more silence there is, the healthier you are.