As human beings, we experience a spectrum of emotions. While happiness and sadness are some very common feelings, insecurity and anxiety are a bit more difficult to understand.
However, most of us feel insecure in our lives. Dealing with insecurity is often tough because you often cannot put a finger on why you are feeling inadequate.
Insecurity is a feeling wherein a person constantly feels not worthy enough or inadequate in some way or the other. When the question ‘Why am I insecure?’ is always on your mind, constant validation becomes a necessity to stay happy.
This feeling can turn into jealousy and lead to a lack of trust between two loving partners. That’s when the blame game begins. You start saying things like, “You said this or you did that, which is making me feel insecure.”
But, the truth is that these are your irrational thoughts and fears that you are projecting on your partner. Are you thinking of how to deal with insecurity? Here are six effective ways to win the battle with your insecurities:
1. Embrace it like your own and see its beautiful side
The best way to stop feeling insecure is to embrace it wholeheartedly. See it this way: when you get a wound, you recover from it and wear the scar with pride. Similarly, put a positive spin on your insecurity and see it as something you can overcome every day.
To deal with such insecurity, start converting your feelings of unworthiness into humility and address it with positive affirmations.
2. Keep a record of your self-esteem file
One of the biggest antidotes to insecurity is high self-esteem. When you are dealing with insecurity, start by analyzing where your self-esteem stands.
Start by complimenting yourself every time you feel insecure. These compliments can be as simple as “I like my shoes” or as big as “I am a great advisor.”
Replace the question “Why am I so insecure?” with “How can I better myself at things that make me confident?”
3. Avoid anyone who makes you feel insecure
While this seems like one of the most straightforward ways to deal with insecurity, it is still one of the most challenging ones to practice.
For instance, your boss is nagging you continuously and making you feel incapable, it is not really possible to stay home every day.
Same goes for your partner or parents making you feel insecure. But, sometimes, you can simply rearrange your schedule or figure out the triggers behind the nagging. It is best to just surround yourself with people who make you feel positive and happy.
4. Keep your batallion of supportive people ready
When it comes to ways to deal with insecurity, this is perhaps one of the most overlooked ones. Even the most social of people have only a handful of trusted people who understand them.
Whenever you feel insecure, recognize these people in your life who are pillars of strength. Take 10 minutes out of your day to talk things out with them every time you feel insecure.
5. Remember that insecurity wears an invisible cape
While we strongly recommend wearing all your challenges like a badge of honor, people struggling with insecurity don’t really feel so.
Insecurity is invisible and nobody can really see through you – not even your partner.
So, one very effective way to deal with insecurity is to convince your mind that only you can see it. It is your relationship with insecurity that you need to take care of first before healing your relationship with your loved ones.
6. Learn to value yourself
Every time you feel insecure, you are focused on feeling something that is lacking in you. It would help if you remember that you add value wherever you go because you bring an absolute uniqueness that only you can provide.
In balanced relationships, both people possess qualities that complement each other. When you are dealing with relationship insecurities, you need to remember that it is your personal traits that are contributing 50% in maintaining a healthy equation.
The more you understand yourself, the more silence there is, the healthier you are. —Maxime Lagacé