People these days think relationships are all about the social side of things, of how “cool” other people think the two of them are together and how the rest of the world perceives them. It’s not like that, relationships are solely about two people regardless of what society thinks or makes of them because it’s their own lives at the end of the day. This piece is going to be about simple rituals, simple ways of living that people need to adapt in order to keep a healthy and balanced relationship and to also make it last long. This is for the people who seek a serious future with their partners and are willing to do anything and everything to make it work. Let’s begin.
25. Don’t limit the number of chances you give each other
People make mistakes, it is only human to make mistakes and it is also human to forgive those mistakes. Don’t ever be the person to take away the chances from your partner, they will make mistakes just like you and they too deserve chances to make things right and to work harder for the relationship and for your collective future.
24. Don’t expect a walk in the park
Even the happiest of relationships aren’t a walk in the park, every good relationship has a lot of ups and downs and it’s natural. Some people think that just because they’re facing a lot of problems, maybe that relationship isn’t for them. That’s not the case, nothing good in life comes easy. If it’s not worth fighting for, it’s not worth it at all.
23. Forget the rest of the world
If you let the world make your decisions, you won’t have a life of your own to live, you’ll solely be a puppet of society and the norms it follows. Do NOT listen to the world and what it has to say about you and your partner. Be content with your partner, be as happy and as sad as you want to be with your partner without the fear of being judged by others. It’s your life, start owning it.
22. Accept your mistakes
Like I said before, it’s only human to make mistakes. And it is completely okay to accept those mistakes, it’s actually advised that you accept your mistakes rather than running around them and make up stories or to eventually lie about it, just be clean and simple about your actions with your partner. Relationships work best when there is complete transparency between two people, and acceptance of mistakes is something that makes it that much more transparent.
21. Forgive more often
Forgiveness is a virtue not everyone can master. It takes a lot of strength to forgive someone and to forget their mistakes, but it’s the way of nature if you want to move on with your lives happily. Learn to forgive your partner for their mistakes, imagine yourself in that situation and imagine how helpless they feel, would you let your partner feel that way? I don’t think so. Forgive and forget. Live and let live.
20. Trust, trust and more trust
A strong level of trust is the building block of every relationship, it’s one of the major pillars on which a relationship stands on. Build as much trust as possible between the two of you. Be completely open about your past, expose your weird sides to them and don’t hesitate to admit to any wrongdoing. A strong level of trust is what takes two people from “just a couple” to “a healthy couple”.
Give each other as much time as you can. Time is the most precious gift you can give someone and your partner needs nothing more than your time. Spend as much time as you can together, it is the only way the two of you will grow as a strong unit with a happy future. Learn to manage time if you have a busy schedule, do not bring up excuses when it comes to love. You should always be “there” for your partner regardless of how busy you are in your life.
Compliments aren’t out of fashion and go a long way. No matter how long you two have been together, never forget to compliment each other. It could be on the way they look, on the way they work or on the way they make you feel, but keep the compliments alive and make sure it happens on a daily basis.
Be each others’ strength in tough times, a strong couple is one in which both partners act as a unit. During tough times, we look at our partners for help and support (even when it’s just emotional support) and it is the key to make or break a relationship. Infinite support is what’s essential in every relationship.
16. Realistic expectations
I’ve mentioned this a lot of times because a lot of people don’t seem to get it. Expectations should be kept very real, unrealistic expectations can lead to a lot of problems and fights. You and your partner are both human, you both know what the other person is capable of and you know where you two stand in life. Do not give each other the burden of expecting more from them, more than they can give.
15. Not even the smallest of lie
Lying is just wrong, it cannot be justified in any way possible. If you think you lied to your partner to save them from some sort of sadness, you were unfair with them because they will find out sooner or later and the fact that you lied is going to hurt them more than the lie itself. I’ve been through this when my ex lied to me and I just felt dazed and confused about it. Keep the level of trust maintained.
14. Give more and expect less
Giving more and expecting less is one of the golden rules of every relationship. When you give more and expect less, you are being the best person you can be with your partner. I’m not saying you’re not going to get anything in return by being so selfless, but that’s the beauty of being selfless. You will find the happiness by giving and by being selfless. It’s a very satisfying feeling.
13. Keep your promises
Promises are supposed to be kept, they shouldn’t be broken. When one promise is broken, no matter how big or small, it starts damaging the trust between two people and it takes a lot of time to get the trust back to normal after that. Be very careful with your promises, don’t just make promises for the heck of it. Make sure you only make promises you can keep.
12. Clear communication
Clear and open communication is key to every lasting relationship, you should be able to talk to your partner without thinking twice about it. Be open, speak your mind, say whatever is bothering you and don’t start keeping things to yourself. Keep a very clear level of communication, even if it feels awkward or uncomfortable, just do NOT keep things to yourself or you’re going to talk it all out at once.
11. Talk openly about personal problems
It is okay to think that you can solve your own problems every once in a while without your partner knowing about them but it’s a good thing to tell them anyway. Let your partners be a part of your problems, no matter how personal they are. Even if sharing those problems feel a bit weird, just do it. It’s for the good of your relationship.
10. Actually listen to each other
Like I said before, open and clear communication is very vital for every long-lasting relationship. Listening to one another is also vital. And when I say “listen”, I mean to actually understand what your partner is saying and not just nodding your heads.
9. Help each other grow
When you’re in love with someone, you need to focus on their positives and to make sure those positive features get stronger with time. You need to help each other grow and make each other as emotionally strong as you can. This is how relationships go beyond all limitations of time.
8. Do not try to change each other
Strong couples accept each other just the way they are, they don’t try to change each other. Love your partner for how unique they are, not the way you want them to be or how someone else is. You are with your partner because of their individuality, never forget that.
7. Respect each other’s feelings
Respect is very important for every relationship. When respect goes out the window, not much is left to work on. Respect each other’s feelings, think twice before saying anything mean or hurtful to them no matter how angry you are. Words can make or break a person.
6. Lift each other up
Like I said, you need to be each other’s strength and you need to focus on the positives. Lift each other up, with your words, with your actions, in any way you possibly can. Do not let your partner feel down because of someone and just remind them of how amazing they are and tell them they can achieve anything in the world.
5. Share a good sense of humour
Two people can go a long way if they know how to make each other laugh. When you have a good sense of humour, you’re one of the blessed ones. You’re one of the people who are hard to come by and can make anyone laugh no matter what they’re going through. And if you can find someone who matches your sense of humour, you have a keeper. Make each other laugh, in even the worst of times.
4. Understand each other
Mutual understanding is something that is very hard to achieve and it goes a long way. Go out of your way to understand each other. Try and understand their problems and their happy moments, try to understand what makes them tick. Do not try to get inside their minds, but understand on your own level. We aren’t supposed to be mind readers here.
3. Appreciate every action
Know how to appreciate each other. No matter how small the gesture may be, appreciate it and don’t let it go unnoticed. When you appreciate your partner, you make them feel like they’ve achieved something in life, you make them feel like they’ve achieved in making you happy and that is a very nice feeling. Appreciate each other.
2. Forget the past
You two love each other because of the present, not the dark past. If you’ve shared anything dark about your past with your partner, you’ve trusted them with everything and you’ve also trusted the fact that they won’t judge you and that they won’t use your past against you in the future. Move on and learn to be happy in the present, do NOT use your partner’s past against them no matter how angry or upset you may be. It will only be a moment of anger for you, but it’ll take your partner back to their dark times and will remind them of everything.
1. Loyalty over everything
It goes without saying that loyalty is everything. It is above everything else when it comes to relationships. Emotional and physical loyalty. Be loyal with each other, with your words and actions. Do not even mentally cheat on them.
Talk your heart out
Is there anything I’ve missed out in the list? Please add your comments below and let me know. And as always, stay blessed and keep the love alive!
“The human body has been designed to resist an infinite number of changes and attacks brought about by its environment. The secret of good health lies in successful adjustment to changing stresses on the body.” – Harry J. Johnson