What makes a couple “perfect”? Is it the way they treat each other? Is it the way they complement each other? Or is it the fact that they turn each other’s imperfections into their perfections?
First of all, there is no standard of “perfection” when it comes to relationships; every couple can be a happy and perfect couple in their way; it all depends on what their definition of perfection and happiness is.
In my case, the perfection in my relationship is defined by the things we do with each other, something that we are both fully aware of but never mention, because we are so correctly used to each other and comfortable with each other’s presence that we have just learned to cherish each other’s efforts.
This article is going to be based on my own life and some of the closest people I know, people who are happy in their lives with their partners.
This is going to be a list of 9 habits of happy couples have but never talk about.
1. They don’t let the outside world affect them
Firm and content partners have a very healthy habit of standing by each other no matter what, no matter who comes up against them or tries to stop them, they’ll keep supporting each other without a doubt.
The outside world consists of good and evil, more evil than sound, some people are going to try to come between you and your partner, they may try planting weird misconceptions in your head about your partner, that is the point where you shun their efforts and keep standing by your partner without any regrets, that is what true love is all about – being there for one another.
Obstacles can come in your relationship in any form and shape. It might be something someone said that incites doubt in you about your partner’s past. It can revolve around society disagreeing with the choices you both make in your relationship, whatever they might be.
But no one else is a part of the bond you share with someone except you and that person. What the outside world says and does is of no concern. The real interest, therefore, lies in the fact that you two have each other’s back at all costs.
It paves a clear road for a healthy relationship that can stand the test of time. The only thing happy couples care about is what they think about each other, how to be their bigger selves for each other, not for the outside world. All we have is people we trust, not the whole world. Partners in a happy relationship have each other to come back to, without the outside world’s interference in their matters and so forth.
2. Complete acceptance
Comfortable and robust couples are those who accept entirely one another without any need for change. Someone who truly loves you for who you are would never try to change anything about you (as long as it’s not a life-threatening habit), they’ll cherish the differences between the two of you because those differences are precisely why you’re unique. They make you the person you are.
Your differences are beautiful, and they define you as an individual. Short-lived romances die down because of the constant need to “improve” and “change.” True love and long-lasting relationships don’t require any changes.
Those in a happy relationship realize the fact that changing one another is no different from being robbed of who they are.
The world is already a place that tries to change you, bending and breaking you to become its idea of perfection, someone who can be controlled adequately. But happy couples know that their relationship is the safest haven to be whoever they want to be, without any restraints. That, in turn, makes the relationship last longer.
They appreciate the similarities, respect the differences, and allow each other full space to be themselves, nothing more or less. And it is only when we are genuinely ourselves and are comfortable in our skin that we can be content with our lives. When you find someone who makes you feel such contentment, it will lead to a healthy relationship indeed.
3. More than enough time without asking for it
Happy couples know how important it is to spend enough time with each other; they will never let each other feel ignored or lonely because they’re always there for one another. Time is one of the most precious gifts in the world, especially in today’s busy world, where everyone has tremendous amounts of things to do every day.
But if you can still take out enough time for your partner, even with everything going on in your life, you’re telling them (indirectly) that they mean the world to you and you’ll always be there for them, that’s what true love is all about, and that’s what makes a relationship durable and “perfect.”
There are only a few things in this life we can give and never get back: words said and time given. Happy couples know this all too well.
When it comes to spending time with each other, they do not even look at their schedule; such people are among the ones who understand what true love is. And they respect each other too when they take out time from their program for their significant other. Spending time with their partner does not imply those happy couples ought to do something new and exciting every time.
It does not even mean taking the other to a fancy restaurant or dedicating the whole day to do what they like. Sometimes, all it means is sitting with their partner and asking them about their day, something that might have made them happy or sad, a new thing they learned about, how that new dish tasted, which they made that day, and so on.
The point is, time is a treasure, and when you lay it out at your partner’s disposal, you are showing them how much they mean to you. That is precisely what happy couples do whenever they get their hands on this treasure.
4. They listen to one another
Happy partners listen to one another, truly listen to the words, and understand them. They look with patience and speak when they know they need to, that’s the essential part. A strong sense of communication is one of the most vital factors of every long-lasting relationship; couples who have an open level of interaction with one another tend to be happier with each other.
Don’t just nod your head or say yes even when you don’t even know what they’re talking about; it will hurt them, it will make them feel like no one listens to them, pay attention.
Happy couples realize the difference between hearing and listening; the former lacks focus and feelings while the latter is both those things. They also understand the fact that by speaking all the time, they are just repeating what they already know, but by listening, they might learn something new.
So they lay everything aside and listen to each other. That does not necessarily mean listening to each other tell long tales from their past. Sure, it can be that too.
But it can also be a straightforward account of meeting someone new that day, their plans for the weekend, something new they have discovered about themselves and so forth. The bigger picture includes both parties knowing the other is there for them to listen and offer any advice and guidance, if possible.
Happy couples genuinely listen to each other instead of waiting for one’s turn to reply, which is what most people do.
It is a beautiful thing to have someone who listens, and happy couples realize the worth of this because some look for a hand to hold, a kind listening ear and a caring heart. Relationships that last longer do so because they have all this, and they cherish it while they still can not when it is too late.
“The human body has been designed to resist an infinite number of changes and attacks brought about by its environment. The secret of good health lies in successful adjustment to changing stresses on the body.” – Harry J. Johnson
