We all know the popular saying, life is short. This is extremely true when you’re happy, healthy, and pursuing all of your passions with the person you love. But for those who are unhappy in their relationship, life can feel quite long. With the right partner by your side, working through life’s inevitable obstacles and storms are things you conquer together. With unsupportive or incompatible partners, these obstacles can seem insurmountable. If there were one piece of relationship advice I could give to a young man who just started dating, it would be to choose your girlfriend wisely. So, how does someone know when they have actually found the right girl? Listed below are four things you should be looking at with your current relationship.
- Do you learn from each other? Life is one big journey – and that journey is a lot more exciting and enjoyable if you share it with the person you love. You don’t need to be with a professor for your partner to open your eyes to new things or ways of thinking. Be with someone who can teach you new things, like how to cook a great cheesecake or play pool. Couples who learn from one another have more to talk about and live a much more diverse life.
- Do you trust each other? Trust is probably the MOST IMPORTANT thing to consider when deciding whether or not you have found the right partner. If both parties can’t trust each other completely, the relationship will be doomed before it even begins. Remember, it will never get easier than it is at the beginning of a relationship. Both partners need to be honest with each other because both people should have mutual respect for one another. If you find yourself worrying when your girlfriend goes out with friends and need to call her and ask where she is, there is no trust there.
- Do you two want the same things? New couples should always discuss their long-term goals. When you’re with the right woman, your goals will align. Both parties must lean into the other to create a shared vision of what your future will be. It’s perfectly okay if you each have some variations in your vision. But if one person is unwilling to bend on their dreams to compromise for the other, then that is a problem.
- Do you love her as she is? One great piece of relationship advice is that people don’t change. People are capable of change, but it’s only possible when they decide to change on their own terms. If you feel in love with your girlfriend but wish she was kinder, smarter, tidier, or less chatty, then that dissatisfaction will only grow as time passes. That doesn’t necessarily mean you have to love every annoying habit they have, but it does mean you need to accept it and be able to live with it forever. Likewise, she will need to feel the same way about all of your quirks and habits.
There are certain things you will feel when you love the right person. Everything else in your life will become easier and you will enjoy every possible minute you have to spend with them. If you’re having problems at work, she’ll walk you through them. If you want to make some major changes in life, she’ll be there to support you. The right partner makes the entire journey of life much less rocky and much more enjoyable. So, as I mentioned earlier, choose your girlfriend wisely. They represent who you and it could end up being one of the most important decisions you ever make.