Relationships are rarely ever going to go as smoothly as people might want them to go. They’re going to require a lot of commitment and effort from all parties involved. For the relationship to be healthy, happy, secure, and meaningful, it is essential that both partners understand the critical aspects of strengthening a relationship. They must always make it a point of treating each other with respect, humility, grace, dignity, patience, and understanding. They need to be able to love and adore one another for who they are.
But it can be challenging whenever you get into a relationship with an overthinker. You might not understand why someone would go over a single thought or idea far too much for far too long. You don’t understand the reasoning behind the overanalyzing of a particular situation or a detail to the point that they are entirely crippled and paralyzed by their thoughts. It can be tough to be patient and stay loyal to them when they’re difficult. But you should still make it a point to love them despite their flaws.
You just really need to be able to understand why they are the way that they are. You need to be able to put yourself in their shoes and see things from their point of view so that you can remind yourself that they aren’t as difficult as they make it seem. Through it all, love is going to be heavily dependent on the two of you just trying to understand one another more and more the deeper you get into your relationship. You should never stop making an effort to understand each other better.
And if you’re looking to gain a better and more profound understanding of your partner who overthinks a lot, then this article is for you. Here are a few things you might want to keep in mind if you’re dating an overthinker.
1. It isn’t their fault that they’re like that.
They are that way because they’ve been wired to be that way. It’s not a conscious choice that they make to be acting a certain way.
2. They need to know that you’re confident in the relationship.
They are going to need you to be confident on their behalf. Their overthinking can lead them to be very anxious a lot of the time. And they are going to turn to you for strength and direction.
3. They stay true to themselves and they want you to be the same way.
They are always going to stay true to who they are and they will always be honest with you. But they’re going to expect you to be the same way. They are going to demand full transparency and honesty within this relationship with you.
4. They need compassion from you.
They know that they’re a big problem. They know that they can be a lot to deal with. They know that they can be a big struggle at times. But that’s why they’re going to need a lot of compassion from you. They suffer from their own overthinking as well. They are also victims here. And they’re going to need your patience, compassion, and understanding.
5. They need you to communicate your feelings more clearly.
In order to ease their mind and their heart, you’re going to have to speak your heart’s truth. You’re going to have to learn to communicate more clearly and more effectively. Your overthinking partner isn’t going to have peace of mind if they’re left to just continually speculate on what you might be feeling deep down inside.
6. Just because they overthink doesn’t mean that they’re crazy.
An overthinker isn’t someone who is crazy. They aren’t necessarily mentally ill. That’s not an assumption that you should make automatically just because they happen to overthink a lot. It just means that they have a hyperactive mind that tends to take notice of details and perspectives that most other people don’t.
7. The need you to follow through on promises.
In order for you to actually ease the mind of the overthinker, then you’re going to have to do whatever you can to ease the doubts that might be in their mind. You should always make it a point to follow through on promises and commitments that you make to them. If you don’t, you’re only going to add to their worry and anxiety.
8. They really believe in the idea of “the one.”
They just really believe that for a relationship to work, it takes two people who are genuinely meant to be together forever. And they just want to make sure that you’re that person for them. They just want to be sure about wanting to spend the rest of their lives with you. But once they’re confident, then you know that they’re committed to you for as long as you two stay together.