10 Stages Of Intimacy In A Relationship

It’s essential to preface this article by saying that all relationships are unique. They all carry with them very distinct personalities and traits that make them special. As human beings, we are all unique in our ways.

We all carry a unique set of traits and characteristics that we bring with us into our relationships. And when we mix those traits with the features of another person, then it just makes everything more complex and profound. And that’s why it’s tough to generalize relationships – but it’s not impossible to spot out specific trends that most relationships are likely to follow.

Typically, all relationships go through specific steps – certain stages. These stages signify specific turning points in relationships that signify just how deep things are going between two people. And again, while all relationships are unique, it’s fairly reasonable to assume that most couples are going to go through these stages the longer that they stay together. Here are the various stages of intimacy in a relationship:

Stage 1: The Initial Meeting

This is the stage where it all starts. For some couples, it happens by chance. Two strangers having a random chance encounter at a random place. For some, it’s a meeting that takes place by design. Two people who are set up by mutual friends perhaps. Or maybe, it’s two friends who have decided to take a chance on one another in a romantic plane.

Stage 2: Getting To Know One Another

For people who are just meeting for the first time, this is the stage wherein you both really build on the initial attraction that was established during the first meeting. This is when you try to explore each other’s surface – to see if there’s something there that both of you can work with moving forward. For those who are already friends, this is still a period for the two of you to get to know one another – but through a different lens this time. You are already friends, and you know each other in that sense. But you’ve never looked at each other through romantic eyes.

Stage 3: Young and Innocent Love

This is the stage of the relationship where everything is still so fresh and new. It’s always exciting and exhilarating. This is usually where a lot of relationships peak. They feel like nothing could go wrong because everything just seems to click. It’s s if everything just falls into place with you two, and there’s nothing that either of you could do to mess it up.

Stage 4: Discovering of Quirks and Annoyances

Now, when the young and innocent love stage of the relationship dies down, the problems and defective parts of the relationship are going to start to present themselves. This is the stage of the relationship wherein the flaws are going to come out and play – and the world isn’t going to be seen through rose-colored lenses anymore.

Stage 5: Ignoring the Quirks

When the blemishes and imperfections of the personalities start to reveal themselves, it’s everyone’s initial instinct always to suppress or ignore them. They don’t want to tarnish whatever perfect perception they have had regarding the relationship up to this point. And so they will make a genuine effort just to ignore the minor annoyances and flaws. They will act as if everything is still perfect in the relationship. It’s almost like a complete stage of denial that things are getting real.

Stage 6: The Reality Sinks In

But then, you can only ignore these annoyances for too long. It gets to a point where you need to address the elephant in the room, and you have to tackle the issues in your relationship as a couple. And that’s when the reality of the relationship starts to sink in.

Stage 7: The Adjustment Period

And then once you make an effort to confront the aspects of your relationship that are less than perfect, you realize that you’re going to have to make a few adjustments yourself. You understand that you need to do your part in meeting your partner halfway. And you also have to be doing your best in trying to put forth the best possible version of yourself. And sometimes, that means having to make a few adjustments to the way you conduct yourself in your relationship.

Stage 8: A Mild Indifference And Irritation

You fight. You make up. You disagree, and you act bitter about it. You just jive, and you feel like you’re floating on cloud nine. And then they do something that upsets you, and you’re back to feeling like you’re stuck in a broken record.

Stage 9: Resurgence of Passion

But then you get reminded of why you’re in a relationship in the first place. You tell yourself of why you fell in love with this person and why you’re fighting so hard to keep things together. And it’s with that realization where you both learn how to humble yourselves.