1. ‘It’s Your Duty To Please Your Partner
Insert the world’s largest eye roll here. This one goes under insanely outdated words of advice from relatives who don’t know when to butt out of conversations. I don’t have to tell you this is terrible advice, but it still felt necessary to put it on the list. I find the best way to shut someone up when this one is thrown out there is to calmly reply, “You’re so right! Let me go make him/her a sandwich right now.” [Read: 8 common mistakes ladies make in a relationship]
2. Make Him/Her Jealous
Whether you heard this one from a friend or your fave ’80s teen drama, it’s not the case. When you’re having problems in your relationship, whether it’d be feeling that person is cheating or not paying enough attention to you, the answer is never to manipulate that person’s emotions. Jealousy won’t get you anywhere. The quickest way to solve a problem is to discuss it openly with your SO and see where that discussion leads, no matter what John Hughes might have taught you. [Read: 6 Reasons why you need to stop the relationship now]
3. That its OK To Lie
Chances are whatever “that” is, you shouldn’t be lying about it. Unless it’s something that doesn’t need to be brought up in the first place (like the fact that you hate your partner’s favorite top, or that you had a weird dream about your ex last night), you should probably be open about it. Keeping secrets from your partner is the easiest route to creating mistrust between the two of you. And that will lead to even more fights than being honest. [Read: 4 saying your relationship is slowly becoming toxic]
4. ‘Long-Distance Relationships Aren’t Worth It’
Yes, long-distance relationships are hard but that doesn’t mean they aren’t worth it. If you’re in a long-distance situation with someone you truly care about, you shouldn’t have to give up on them because of the added challenge. With the million possible ways we can reach each other (hello, Skype!) LDRs are no longer have to involve the strenuous task of sending a message via carrier pigeon to your love. If distance is creating rifts between you two, that’s another story. But if you guys have it all figured out, don’t let anyone change your opinion. [Read: 5 signs your ex-girlfriend will eventually come back]
5. You Can’t Be Yourself
When you have to pretend to be someone you’re not in the relationship, it’s time to jump that ship, pronto. Because anything falsely built will eventually sink. (You can tell I’m really trying to extend this brilliant metaphor.) But anyway. This isn’t some huge revelation, because if you have to lie about who you are, it’s kind of a no-brainer that you’re lying to yourself about the relationship. Yet it can be another one of those annoyingly difficult things to admit to yourself for sure. Whether you’re trying to change or conceal yourself, eHarmony explained that you’re not only denying warning signs about the relationship, you’re also denying yourself the opportunity to be loved for who you really are. And real intimacy can never grow from that.
6. Snooping is never okay
Your friend might tell you that it is okay to look through your bae’s phone once in a while, but it’s not. It’s so wrong! Snooping on your partner is never recommended. If you feel that your partner is perhaps cheating on you, it’s better to have a clear means of communication with them instead of secretly trying to find out. This is the best way to respect yourself, your partner and the relationship.